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CansaFis Foote's avatar

…rapt…i wonder if some of the drug’s high is captured in an ever vibration from that first foray, the buzzed nostalgia some ancient line into the narcotic purpose…how is the reflection process walking back down these streets? does it let out more than it drags up?…when i reflect on the drugs i immediately conjure eras…the naughty confused excitement of true youth…the plunging tempt towards darkness of early adulthood and the sad lingering never end of the middle ages…i got some midwest boyz still texting me as i awake to walk the dogs on the west coast, high on a night of lines and old 90’s hip hop…there is little difference now and then it seems in that window we connect…they even call it the same old same old…and i still cringe a little at the sanctimony and fear i held for what happens in all the moments i can’t see…loving this series, great writing…

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Kerry On's avatar

I have been thinking about this comment a lot! Love when my brain grows an hurts. I do think drugs change some sort of vibration in us. The darkness of early adulthood hits hard and fits perfectly. Getting these things out is making me feel lighter. I did not plan on sharing my drug use, I worried it would trigger me to want to do it again, but it has not. But, it is a very important aspect of the story. More to come on all of this! Thank you so much for reading and for your comments that really make me analyze.

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Gina CM Scrappy's avatar

“Jay holds the plate for me like you would hold the door open for a date. He brushes my hair to the side and I snort up the line”

Drug dealer romancing 101!! Love it. So relatable that the sip of coffee I just took almost tasted like a drip.

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Kerry On's avatar

YOU GET IT! :) I was hoping not to fully trigger anyone. Thanks for subscribing. I truly appreciate it.

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Henny Hiemenz's avatar

Ho-lee shit Kerry. I’ll tell you this, sambucha and coke are two things I’ve known forever that I wanted no part of. Definitely interested in reading the upcoming stories!

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Kerry On's avatar

I do not recommend either of them, but especially the Sambuca.

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Henny Hiemenz's avatar

Duly noted

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Jack Jackson's avatar

I can easily tell the most outrageous tale about myself and just laugh. But when I read something of yours in a similar vein, my heart just breaks. I want everyone to live their best life, including all the stimulants one can handle, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to cuddle you in my arms and protect you. Keep on doing you!

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Kerry On's avatar

You are so incredibly sweet. Definitely lots more to come on these topics.

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wayback machine's avatar

This is great

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Kerry On's avatar

Thank you so much!

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Sudana Krasniqi's avatar

weird part is, I haven’t touched cocaine in over a decade and sometimes even reading about it stirs up so many emotions

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Kerry On's avatar

Me too...I thought about putting a disclaimer, but I figured the title was enough. Thanks for reading it!!! I am honored.

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Sudana Krasniqi's avatar

I am a firm believer in NO TRIGGER WARNINGS! If we had to live it, you’ll be alright reading about it for 4 mins.

And you’re so welcome, I love your stories!

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small victories's avatar

Oh boy, is this bringing some stuff back.

I love cocaine. I mean I *LOVE* it. I was always afraid to do try it.

Drinking, though, since 18 onward (up until 2 years ago) – well. That was another story.

Working in the restaurant industry brought coke front and center for me. A manager, while we were in her office counting money in the safe one night, offered me a bump.

I was feeling damn good from drinking half my shift so I said sure.

Before long I was buying $200 a night, then going home to my roommates, one of whom was a fairly big dealer. Good stuff, straight from Columbia. In addition to what I was buying we'd do a gram or two as well for free. All the while drinking.

As you can probably guess problems came about. Mostly from my drinking, actually.

I'll be looking forward to reading the next parts of this series.

P.S. Sambuca is AWFUL. When I drank an entire liter of sambuca one night when my drinking was at its worst, I knew without a doubt that I had a problem because I despise it.

Anyway, thank you for sharing.

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